I have been drinking Guinness and watching Life on Mars? The BBC one with John Simm.
I do know Scotty has won. Big whoop. He’s fine. He isn’t terrible. Just not my type of singer.
So, as a way to give some closure, here is my Idol 10 winner, Miss Haley, and some Zeppelin for you. Fall and all. It’s still the MOMENT.
Haley was sent packing, millions Idol fans cried, Michael Slezak and Annie Barrett have both curled up in the fetal position.
Me? Well. I’m eating spanakopita.
And I have now said goodbye to Idol for the last time.
I have no real wish to watch next week. I’ll end up watching the results show just to see Haley, Casey, Paul, Pia. But I’m tired of watching Scotty’s three-month coronation party.
There will be no more Idol posts. I’ll start-up with X-Factor come fall. But this season of Idol, which began with such promise, turned into one of the biggest farces in the hostory of entertainment. And I cannot witness any more of the lunacy.
Thanks to the many faithful readers who would always send a tweet. And if you must continue to read about Idol, I would like to suggest you read Claire Zulkey’s pieces over at The AV Club. She is a witty and honest Idol watcher. I’ll read her posts just to comment on how I will never subject myself to Randy Jackson and RyRy Seabreeze ever again.
I would like to start of reiterating that I hate the judges and everything they have said this season except for the audition rounds, when they still had some guts and the ability to say “Fuck a duck”. Thank you.
Tonight’s show was part Velveeta smothered Velveeta, part realizing I don’t listen to much country music radio anymore, part screaming “Zeppelin” while my daughters looked on in resignation, and part hating the judges and loving Jimmy Iovine. I haven’t been this passionate about a contestant since season seven. I am obsessed about Haley making it to the top two. But is this purely reactionary? I don’t think so- I was coming around to her before the insanity of the judging hit me. A lot of comment boards have quoted some blogger’s study of the critiques this year, where Haley had some 17 notes about how terrible she is, mostly from Randy. I once told her she made me fall asleep. Listening to her recording of “Blue” now, I realize that it wasn’t really Haley. It was the song. I have always disliked that song. And the news earlier today about her singing Zeppelin just cinched it. The girl has impeccable music taste.
But we have to start of with the king of Gorgonzola, Scotty “Eyebrow raise side leaning” McCreery. Of his three songs tonight, I hate one, am ambivalent about another, and had never heard the third. I’ll let you guess which is which. Yeas, “Amazed” ia one of those cheesy ass love songs about how perfect that other person is that makes me puke in my mouth a bit every time I hear it. Scotty’s vocal was fine for what it was. His second song, Thompson Square’s “Are You Gonna Kiss Me Or Not” is one of the few songs on the planet I’m not familiar with in any shape or form. It was his best performance of the evening.
The less said about his Lawrence Welk audition with “She Believe’s In Me”, the better. That was horrific.
Lauren impressed me this week. She’s still in desperate need of proper vocal training- she was breathless and behind in her cadences most of the night. But she has a voice under all that spray tan, eye makeup, and hair extensions. But she sounded really good on both The Band Perry’s “If I Die Young” ( another song I don’t know) and “I Hope You Dance” ( a song that makes me blubber). I am, however, gonna have to tell her, as a huge Faith Hill fan, to never sing “Wild One” ever again. She just can’t pull of the sass and I can’t stand the fact she seemed to hyperventilate her way through that song, and she can’t outgrowl Haley, so that growly end to “I Hope You Dance” was a bit of a mess. I think Lauren earned the right to be a part of the finale. I just don’t think she has the fan base.
Haley, though, might make it in on pure talent, tenacity, and a fanatical Idol base tired of being manipulated. Nigel has been bitching all week about bloggers being brats. Well, you know what, Nigel? We are. We whine, we commiserate, we bitch. We also are smart enough to know that you read us all and you take notes. This week The judges threw out some very subtle critiques, particularly to Lauren. Haley was however, praised, even during her last song. Granted, the judges did praise the right parts of “You Oughta Know”, and Haley did mess up a lyric. But those choruses were packed with WOW! I even liked “Rhiannon”, one of my all time favourite songs. It was a great contrast with her other two songs, the angry Alanis classic and the deep, rich textures of jazz, blues, and classic rock that was Led ZEppelin’s “What Is and What Should Never Be”. She may have tripped up the stairs during that performance, but she held it together and nailed that sucker.
It’s a tough one. I’ve seen Haley trending off and on through the night on Twitter. The raw numbers page on Dial Idol has Haley in a massive lead, even if she sits at the bottom of the predictions board.
So I’m going to hold to my all girl finale prediction from last week. I think Scotty’s “Fanbase” is actually less solid than people think. I rarely meet anyone who really, truly thinks he’s going to make it in coutry music. He’s not untalented as a singer, but we are talking country raido. Those PD’s are mean sonsofbitches.
I’m picking Scotty to go home. He lacked a real moment.
