Past Eurovision Winners And Losers, And Other Oddities

My North American friends, the ones not as obsessed with everything music around the world no matter how obscure or terrible they may be ( hi, Soviet era pop music!) have tweeted me about Eurovision. They have all been touched by Eurovision, even if they didn’t realize it. I mean, they’ve all heard “Waterloo”. They haven’t been living in caves near Tora Bora.

But the following is a list of Eurovision songs they may not have heard of, but they should probably listen to. Just to round out their musical education.

2011 Idol Snark Post #1: Just… No. Boys and Girls… Just No.

Two nights. Two. And this is what I have to say.

Oh, come on!

If it weren’t for Casey Abrams, I’d write off the damn thing.

The girls were terrible. The boys were mediocre.

Steven and Jennifer were effusive and uncritical. When Randy is the voice of reason, something is wrong.

And DO NOT SING SONGS BY FORMER IDOL WINNERS. Also, stop singing “Fallin’”. How many fucking times do I have to tell you girls, stop singing that song?

Every goddamned year.

Although, I give credit to James for singing Judas Priest. Never thought I’d see the day. And Thia wasn’t horrible.

As it is, there is too much screechy shit, too many runs, too many off-key performances, too many weird dance moves, too many people I already dislike intensely ( Clint Jun, Lauren Alaina, Jordan). I just want it all to stop.

Casey for the win. I love Mumford and Sons. And he looks like he belongs in that group. And I also love “I Put A Spell on You”, which was TyraBanksSays FIERCE.

I swear these reviews will get better once I start really giving a damn. Somewhere around top four.

 

10 O’Clock Live: What’s Right and What’s Not

As I said two weeks ago in my review of the first episode of 10 O’Clock Live, live television is the toughest gig in the world. Throw in the fact that this show is not run by trained journalists but very smart comedians and one former musician turned presenter and you can see where some of the work needs to be done. It’s first episode was uneven. The second one was a near train wreck ( as much as I adore David Mitchell, he wasn’t great up against spin meister Alistair Campbell, who clearly is great at spin even if I disagreed with nearly every word he said. And that was a highlight for me). The third one sees the show finding its rhythms a bit better. It’s far from perfect, but as I have said since the beginning, it’s got a great premise and a strong on air team.

Now, they just need to use Lauren Laverne better.

American Idol Snark Post: I’m Sorry, I Got A Speck of Glitter in My Eye *Sniff*

Idol makes it hard for me every year with the sob stories. I tend to get aggravated by them. Because so much focus is not on the (supposed) talent of the Idol wannabe and on the fact they overcame some sad but ultimately life affirming thingy. In the end, its how they handle themselves. David Cook handled his brother’s cancer with class. Danny Gokey pimped his dead wife. Guess who I ended up voting for?

But Idol decided not to play fair this year and presented me with Paris, a 23-year-old mum with a hearing impaired five-year-old.

Fuck, Idol.

I’m a mother of a hearing impaired eight-year-old. We mums of DAHH kids tend to fight for each other because it’s a tough life trying to communicate with someone with limited resources.  Since her daughter uses hearing aids, I know that there is an ability for vocalization, but I really just want to go down to New Orléans and hug poor Paris and tell her that she has a group of people across the world that support her without even knowing her. And then tell her to move to Canada because Universal Health Care means my daughter gets new hearing aids every five years for free. Those things are expensive.

Paris, though, had a lovely voice that was brought down by nerves and pitch issues. Plus she sang an Idol winners song. Big no-no in Kirsten’s world. Don’t do that.

The rest of the contestants on this brief episode ( only an hour- huge sigh if relief) were perfectly pleasant. A lot of strong voices in the Big Easy, and several went through. There was the dude who showed his abs and basically slobbered all over Jennifer Lopez ( yeah, she’s gorgeous, but come on, people). The girl who gave Randy a bunch of photos and a visit with his high school (fake) football coach. J.C., the fifteen year old who looks like the kid animated in Up and sang like an angel. But my fave was Brett, the dude with the squeaky speaking voice, Mick Hucknall hair, and the ability to make me pay attention to “Bohemian Rhapsody” again.

I like the fact they are keeping the highly delusional off this year, and that the ones they have dismissed as not being good enough have taken it so well. No security guards to haul Idol wannabes out this season!

I hope it gets less mundane, though. Soon.

Best of 2010 Recap

Just a reminder of my best of 2010 lists.

The top ten TV series of 2010 are here.

The top twenty albums of 2010 are here.

The top twenty songs of 2010 are here.

The Top Ten TV Shows 2010

TV hasn’t gotten worse, has it? Or does it just feel that way, seeing as the only show I still watch that debuted in September is Raising Hope, which benefits from being a sitcom that is funny. Laugh out loud funny. It has a ways to go, but it is literally the only new show I watch regularly.

It is a sad state. Most of the shows on my list this year were on last year’s. There are a couple of new ones- they’re British and I discovered them this year. But when it all comes down to it, it’s just sad that I can’t come up with newer stuff more often. And that House can still make my top 20 simply because of Hugh Laurie and Robert Sean Leonard’s performances and nothing else.

It Is Emmy Weekend. Let’s Do The Prediciton Game.

Every year the Emmy nominations get released and I get enormously cranky because the Emmys are very Hollywood based and neglect international television airing on specialty TV networks ( exception to the rule: Extras). They also neglect genre shows and are enormously repetitive. Years of seeing Buffy, The Gilmore Girls, and similar get ignored for constant over nominated shows like Frasier and ER makes the Emmys a suspect organisation.

Sadly, I still obsess over it, because that’s what I do. I obsess over award shows and get rather indignant when the voters don’t listen to my opinion. My opinion is always-ALWAYS- correct. Best they remember that.

THat being said, with the awards tomorrow night, here are my predictions for what should happen tomorrow. Sadly, there will be no love for two of the greatest TV shows in the world, Doctor Who and Peep Show. How that makes me sad.

DRAMA
OUTSTANDING DRAMA
Lost
Breaking Bad
Dexter
Mad Men
True Blood
The Good Wife

I keep going back and forth between the cool, molasses paced sixties drama Mad Men and the dark, fiery psychopathic Breaking Bad, both from AMC. I’m leaning towards Mad Men, as last season was just so amazing to watch. The last episode remains earth shatteringly good.

I’ve never been a Lostie, but I can acknowledge it is a good show and is well produced. It just ain’t my cup o’ tea. Emmy has been known to hand out awards in final seasons just ’cause. It wouldn’t shock me if they did it this year. As for the other three, Dexter is waning, The Good Wife is a fine program but not my thing ( and not as good as the AMC dramas), and True Blood is one of the worst shows on TV now.

Will Win: Lost

Should Win: Mad Men

Ignored For No Reason: Fringe

OUTSTANDING ACTRESS IN A DRAMA
Julianna Margulies (The Good Wife)
Mariska Hargitay (Special Victims Unit)
Glenn Close (Damages)
Kyra Sedgwick (The Closer)
January Jones (Mad Men)
Connie Britton (Friday Night Lights)

Just give the award to Connie Britton so we can all move on with our lives please. This coming from someone who actually doesn’t like FNL.

Of course, it will actually go to Julianna Margulies, an actress I’m pretty ambivalent to.

Will Win: Julianna Margulies

Should win: Connie Britton

Ignored Unjustly: Anna Torv of Fringe. Seriously.

OUTSTANDING ACTOR IN A DRAMA
Jon Hamm (Mad Men)
Kyle Chandler (Friday Night Lights)
Bryan Cranston (Breaking Bad)
Hugh Laurie (House M.D.)
Michael C. Hall (Dexter)
Matthew Fox (Lost)

Hugh Laurie still doesn’t have an Emmy. I will continue to scream out “HUGH LAURIE DOESN’T HAVE AN EMMY HOW SCREWED UP IS THAT!” until someone hands him the gold.

That being said, I suspect Bryan Cranston might make it a three-peat.

Will Win: Bryan Cranston

Should Win: Hugh Laurie. I shall never cease to champion this man for an Emmy that he should have one SIX YEARS AGO and every year since.

Ignored for reasons beyond explanation: Timothy Olyphant for Justified.

OUTSTANDING SUPPORTING ACTOR IN A DRAMA
John Slattery (Mad Men)
Aaron Paul (Breaking Bad)
Martin Short (Damages)
Terry O’ Quinn (Lost)
Michael Emerson (Lost)
André Braugher (Men of a Certain Age)

I suspect it will go to one of the Losties. It shouldn’t. Anyone who has seen Breaking Bad knows what I mean.

Will Win: Michael Emerson

Should win: Aaron Paul

Ignored ignored ignored because on genre show: John Noble from Fringe. If he was nominated, though, he’d win. Right? Right.

OUTSTANDING SUPPORTING ACTRESS IN A DRAMA
Sharon Gless (Burn Notice)
Christine Baranski (The Good Wife)
Christina Hendricks (Mad Men)
Rose Byrne (Damages)
Archie Panjabi (The Good Wife)
Elisabeth Moss (Mad Men)

She’s the glorious curvy red-head who runs the show on Mad Men and has consistently been the best thing about the show. Christina Hendrick’s Joan is one of the great characters of the past few years. She’s a goddess and don’t you all forget it.

Will and Should Win: Christina Hendricks

Ignored: No one. This list is pretty solid.
COMEDY
OUTSTANDING COMEDY
Glee
Modern Family
Curb Your Enthusiasm
Nurse Jackie
30 Rock
The Office

Oh, how I adore Glee. The singing, the dancing, the over the top dramatics, the insanity of Ryan Murphy et al.

It won’t win. Not because it doesn’t deserve to. But because Modern Family really is that much better ( guess which show I caught up on this summer).

Will and Should Win: Modern Family

Ignored after not being ignored last year: How I Met Your Mother, although I suspect I’m the only person on the planet who thought last season was the best since season two.

OUTSTANDING ACTRESS IN A COMEDY
Lea Michele (Glee)
Tina Fey (30 Rock)
Toni Collette (The United States of Tara)
Julia Louis-Dreyfus (The New Adventures of Old Christine)
Edie Falco (Nurse Jackie)
Amy Poehler (Parks and Recreation)

This category is always tricky. First season freshman phenoms sometimes swoop in and win. But Lea Michele didn’t give the best performance of the year, that was Amy Poehler, who deserves the god damn Emmy. I hate her show, but I adore her on it. You know how that makes me crazy.

Will Win: Lea Michele

Should Win: Amy Poehler

Why was she ignored: Portia de Rossi. Come ON!

OUTSTANDING ACTOR IN A COMEDY
Larry David (Curb Your Enthusiasm)
Alec Baldwin (30 Rock)
Matthew Morrison (Glee)
Steve Carell (The Office)
Jim Parsons (The Big Bang Theory)
Tony Shalhoub (Monk)

Oh, Christ. How do you pick. Seriously. How? Eliminate Shaloub ( again, how does this keep happening?) and look what we are left with.  Matthew Morrison doesn’t stand a chance, take him out of it, and look what’s still there. How do you choose. How does Emmy pick a winner. I’m tossing a coin.

Will, should, and most likely will win: Larry David. That’s what the coin said.

Ignored: Ed O’Neill, who would deserve to win if he was up there instead of Tony effing Shaloub.

OUTSTANDING SUPPORTING ACTOR IN A COMEDY
Chris Colfer (Glee)
Neil Patrick Harris (How I Met Your Mother)
Jesse Tyler Ferguson (Modern Family)
Jon Cryer (Two and A Half Men)
Eric Stonestreet (Modern Family)
Ty Burrell (Modern Family)

Again. Take out the undeserving Cryer ( who inexplicably won this category last year). Pick one.  Just… I  dare you to. Coin time again.

Will, should, and probably will win: Chris Colfer came out on top of the coin game.

Ignored for Jon Cryer on a crap Chuck Lorre program: Kunal Nayyar, who stars on the good Chuck Lorre program, The Big Bang Theory. Parsons gets all the glory. Galecki is the straight man. Helberg and Nayyar are equally funny. Give them some love.

OUTSTANDING SUPPORTING ACTRESS IN A COMEDY
Jane Lynch (Glee)
Kristen Wiig (Saturday Night Live)
Jane Krakowski (30 Rock)
Julie Bowen (Modern Family)
Sofia Vergara (Modern Family)
Holland Taylor (Two and A Half Men)

Sure bet is written all over this category. 

Will, should, must win: Jane Lynch.

 

Desert Island Picks: DVDs

I decided something. I double discs can be counted as a single album, DVD box sets count as a single DVD. After all, why would anyone take season three of The West Wing when one can take the box set?

DVD’s are a difficult thing. I could easily package up ten different TV series box sets. I didn’t do that. ( I took only two complete series, and two seasons of another, plus the only season ever of a fifth). So the following are the five TV series DVDs and five movies I would take with me to an island.